Parallel with Alan Turing

Alan Turing is known as one of the fathers of theoretical computer science, and he also played an instrumental role in protecting Britain against the attacks of the German Nazi forces during WWII.

However, Turing is also remembered that because he was openly gay, he was forced to be treated with medication to resolve his homosexuality, was hospitalised and eventually was led to commit suicide.

In 2019, most developed countries accept homosexual and bisexual individuals as fully sane and acceptable, and do not try to medicate the homosexuality out of them. Here in Israel, openly gay, bisexual and lesbian individuals are subject to the same rights and responsibilities as straight individuals, and while a few issues are still a matter of unresolved debate, a gay person can lead a fully normal amd healthy life, without being sedated and medicated.

But it's not all roses.

Hypomania and MDD as the new Homosexuality:

I have had https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Major_depressive_disorder and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hypomania and even one major https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mania and several shorter manias. This is documented on my homesite and other online social media writing.

Now here is a revelation:

post-WWII :: Turing :: homosexuality <=> 2019 :: Me (= Shlomi Fish) :: Hypomanias

And I have been medicated and sedated with harmful drugs and now hospitalised in a psychiatric ward, where my access to the outside world is an interconnected windows 10 computer full of malware, instead of the better managed GNU/Linux boxes I can use at home, along with all my online accounts, which I'd rather not access here (for security reasons)

A committee of several experts has made me stay in the ward for several two week segments, trying to rehabiltate me, while I would be happier in my room at home. I missed https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rosh_Hashanah and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/International_Talk_Like_a_Pirate_Day - two of my favourite holidays and I am about to miss https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yom_Kippur and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sukkot , which sports the ICon Festival which I find very inspirational.

Someone asked me if I feel I am comparable to Turing. Well, according to https://www.shlomifish.org/me/resumes/Shlomi-Fish-Resume-as-Writer-Entertainer.html I am even comparabale to such historical great people as https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Larry_Wall (who is also quite obscure), https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sesame_Street , https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buffy_the_Vampire_Slayer , https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Beatles , etc.

Right now I am playing the old "fox-in-the-hens'-coop" motiff like Joseph in prison, or Summer Glau in https://www.shlomifish.org/humour/Summerschool-at-the-NSA/ , in which case what happens when you put a Great Hacker/Action Hero (see: http://www.paulgraham.com/gh.html ) in a secluded place with many minor hackers, and several lazy "I just work here" ppl who do their job in the worst possible manner, is not a crashed great hacker, but instead many happy hackers workers who are happy to provide their customers with royalty service, even if they are not paid a lot to do it, and many hacker or great hacker inmates.

Taylor Swift as a hypomania-"sufferer'

If you're into contemporary music, you likely have heard of Taylor Swift, a very successful singer-songwrier which is known for her interesting narrated lyrics, positively extravagant and mind-blowing videos, constant philantropism (which does not prevent her from becoming richer_, and a rich youtube culture of youtubers who cover her songs, parody them, remix them, and comment on them. I realised that she became a Hacker Monarch - one of several by the time I and other freenodeers joked about her suing Apple Inc. for using the "Swift" trademark for Apple Swift.

Now here is a revelation, based on the lyrics to Swift's hit song Shake It Off: "I stay up too late" , "got nothing on my brain" it seems that she is often hypomanic but instead of battling it, she enjoys it as she is more creative, more energetic, more insightful and more socialable and interesting.

Hypomania is OK:

Hypomania has been believed to be treatable with medication, just like homosexuality in Turing's time, but I pretty much know it only causes many harmful side-effects and in my case increasingly deprive me of physical energy. My parents thought that using these drugs allowed me to graduate from a B.Sc. in EE in the Technion, but not only did they not help, but I now know that these were the 6 and a half most soul destroying, unproductive, useless and uninspiring years of my life. And that was only because the only reason I continued to learn there was because I wanted to get the diploma so I'll get more lucrative, higher paying, jobs. If I studied im the Technion or elsewhere, because it was fun, and to expand my horizons, or become a more effective writer / software developer / amateur philosopher / entertainer , then it would be less of a torture.

In this day and age people can learn enough about all that by starting from my homesite - www.shlomifish.org and following the text of the essays, stories and screenplays, and links. While it took me a long time to hone my skills to my level, I wish future people who wish to try to emulate me, to have an easier time. I may be a badass writer and entertaimer, but given I know I should "Publish or Perish" and love to share my wisdom and knowledge anyway, and wish people to learn from my mistakes and my successes.

Most of my screenplays, stories, bits, factoids, the few videos (they are very lame compared to the videos of Taylor Swift but they are a start), tweets etc. were inspired by thoughts I had during

hypomanias, and I quite enjoy it.

Sometimes I get into periods of mild depressions during which I like to code a lot and to chat less passionately and philosophically on IRC. Or I get into "deep work mode" when I write or refactor / transition a lot of code or churn a large amount of text. These are also ok.

Taylor Swift should not be worried from being medicated for being Bipolar. She may do "strange" things such as:

Policemen are unlikely to detain her, and she can use social engineering and Saladin style benevolent psychological warfare so they just give her a ride back home, or leave her alone with them thinking that her behaviour just "comes with the territory".

Perhaps I have mischaracterised Ms. Swift here, but the point is that these behaviours, although eccentric, unconventional, and non-conformist are perfectly logical, and I will do the same if I were a wealthy bipolar person.

The Sad Story of My Treatment:

However, I am not so lucky.

In the break after my second Techmion semester, during which I started writing The One With The Fountainhead - which is a parodical crossover of Ayn Rand's The Fountainhead and the Friends T.V. show, which is one of the funniest, most politically incorrect and yet some people's favourite of my screenplays.

Moreover, I corresponded with my friend Omer Zak and came up with the opening meme to the Summerschool at the NSA effort.

All of this made me maniacal and out of control and I came up with an imaginary world where Star Trek DS9, Buffy, Sabrina, CEIA Neo-Tech, various characters from Judaism , some of their stars, and some of my own friends and relatives were real and integrated together.

I did a lot of crazy stuff, but eventually a psychiatrist asked me if I thought if it sounded logical that I could hear what other people could tell me when I had it and I snapped out of the mania.

I was treated with harmful drugs that had many side effects, and did not prevent future hypomanias or other mood swings. Furthermore, my hypomanias were incredibly productive for me resulting in stuff I placed on my homesite - and on other social media sites, and which many similar minded hackers (both male and female) enjoyed, complimented me for it, thought they were funny, or alternatively thought they were blasphemous which indicates they were true.

But the people who wanted me to be "mentally healthy" told me these things were irrational, wrong, "mania-driven" and that they were nonsense and that I should not give them weight.

Bullshit!!! They were insightful, fresh, and endured their time.

Now currently I have suffered from many harmful antipsychotics - it may still be fixed but what if instead of these harmful legal drugs, I would have been treated with good word therapy, possibly [CBT]

(https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_behavioral_therapy) or more preferably Saladin-style positive therapy.

How many potential Taylor Swifts were forced to be a "Shlomi Fish" like me, who despite all was very productive and insightful, or were just hospitalised and sedated and fought against by mediocre minds, who think conformism is mental health, while it is the opposite and conformism leads to Superior orders, including "I just work here" small minded attitude which leads to sadism and vandalism and loss of lives and property that took a lot of effort to construct by hard working, enthusiastic individuals.

So I say: "do what you want, not what you feel you have to. The choice is in your hands. Whatever you do, I'll accept that." These words go back at least to Moses and were extended and conveyed by greater and greater "memes" including the Taylor Swift "Shake it Off" song and the somewhat more established "Highway to Hell" by AC/DC (these are both links to my favourite covers of them).

Some advice to Taylor Swift

  1. You are speaking in riddles too much (and in fact mentioned it in one of your songs