Queen Padmé Tales: Nighttime Flight - Ongoing Text [satire]
Why can’t we have them all?
Abstract
Objective
This ambitious series of screenplays breaks a long-time taboo against writing Star Wars and Star Trek crossovers, but also aims to make the case for commercial yet free/open (Creative Commons / etc.) fan fiction / crossovers / real person fiction (see e.g: Our mission statement) and screenplays written in easier to write formats than the draconian, finicky, and boring, Hollywood-blessed format.
Abstract
While the birth parents of Queen Padmé Amidala of the Naboo of the Selinaverse (Tiffany Alvord , b. 1992) were killed in a starship crash when she was 1 years old, she was adopted by her aunt, the Duchess Elizabeth Amidala (Natalie Portman), and her aunt's husband, Darth Vader, who volunteered to act as King in effect until Padmé's coming of age. As a result, Padmé had a happy childhood until she turned 18 at 2010 and was ready to become the bona fide monarch of Naboo.
Padmé already learned enough about managing a planet country by volunteering to help Vader, and he encouraged her to do so. On the surface, she is happy:
She is the richest person in Naboo and one of the richest women in the galaxy.
She has enough free time to contribute on Internet content and code sharing sites.
She has many supporting friends, including her boyfriend, Anakin Skywalker (Jake Coco), a promising jedi-wannabe, who is about her age, and with aspirations for joining the mysterious but revered jedi order of Siths, of which only Vader and Emperor Palpatine are the known extant members.
In practice, though, there is the Sword of Damocles:
Critics on online publications and social media who are unhappy with every choice she makes.
A poorly executed takeover attempt by a “real life” celebrity (Emma Watson) thought to be flawless.
Her boyfriend being so busy with his studies that he becomes awfully laconic even in his emails.
Her spirit friends, who are animated characters from My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic and other fantastical universes, who appear at the seemingly least desirable moments, and whom everyone can see, hear, photograph, and record, but whom many people believe are some kind of trick.
And her biggest pet peeve: her positive bank balance which keeps getting larger, despite her many attempts to reduce it.
Queen Padmé Tales: Nighttime Flight
Node LinkAbout this screenplay
Node LinkNextObjective
Node LinkNext[ An illustrated screenplay crossing Star Wars Ep. I, the original Star Wars trilogy, the Selinaverse (itself crossing Star Trek TNG/DS9, Buffy, Judaism, Israel, Objectivism, etc.) the real world online/offline life in 2010s/2020s, Spaceballs, and My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.
This screenplay is not written in the Hollywood blessed format because good hackers (= resourceful and rule bending heroes) which include the talented actors and actresses in this film can withstand reading a raw and non-CSS-styled XHTML5 file. That - and hackers like me do not have the time to massage a screenplay into Hollywood's whimsical format only to be rejected, rinse and repeat. ]
Licence
PrevNode LinkNext[ Emblem:
This text is Copyright by Shlomi Fish , 2020 and is made available under the Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 Unported Licence (CC-by) (or at your option - any later version). ]
Dedication
PrevNode Link[ The Dedication: ]
Nighttime Flight
PrevNode Link[ Black screen.
Logo:
Initial Credits.
Note: it seems likely this screenplay was inspired by the Muslim ascension to heaven story, but note that it is not meant to be Islamic canon, and may be a parody. Assuming the Salman Rushdie story about death threats against him is correct, please both cancel them and don't issue ones against me or anyone else. ]
[ Padmé is sleeping in her bed. Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, and Twilight Sparkle materialize. ]
[ Twilight Sparkle uses her magic horn to make Fluttershy larger, not unlike Disney's Hercules Pegasus.
Padmé mounts Fluttershy and the quartet flies away.
Twilight Sparkle opens a portal vortex and they fly through it into north-central Tel Aviv at daytime.
After flying for a while, Discord materialises. ]
[ The three winged ponies fumble to prevent Padmé from falling to death. Eventually she falls onto a tent in Olamot Con, and descends to the ground unkempt, but mostly unharmed.
Padmé gets up only to see Shlomi Fish looking at her and the three ponies with interest. ]
[ Padmé wakes up only to see Discord in front of her eyes. ]
[ Padmé screams and then wakes up again. ]