#xkcd: Programming Languages’ Sex Talk - Fortune [possible satire]

rindolfBucket: FAILURE IS ALWAYS AN OPTION.
Bucketrindolf: I already had it that way
ephphathatime to kick aliens into orbit
rindolfIt's not a failure, it's a motivation to improve.
njsgrindolf: failure is always an option except when your goal is to fail
njsg</fortune-cookie>
njsgrindolf: except in bed
BucketI get great sex, except in bed.
rindolfnjsg: heh.
rindolfnjsg: in bed? Do you mean I make mistakes while sleeping?
rindolfnjsg: "What is your favourite position? CTO!"
WaltherFailures in bed mean you have sex that isn’t type-safe; otherwise you would catch the errors at compile time
rindolfWalther: heh, LOL.
Waltheralso, Haskell<3
njsgI have a lipht, my sex has no separate compile time
Waltherbwhaha
* Waltherhas changed the topic to: It's programming language + sex hour at #xkcd! | SCOTUS says [corporate] religious freedom trumps equal benefits for women in 5-4 ruling, FML | Weekly Coffee Appreciation Day | It's put The0x539 in bucket hour! | mint hour | (association football) | knockout talk time | https://www.humblebundle.com/sgdq Ch
njsgwasn't there an UI toolkit called "sex"?
Fephistosex-purity
SirCmpwnI once wrote an assembler called .orgASM
SirCmpwn(.org is an assembler directive)
bhuddahmaybe we should invent the scripting language "innuendo"
rindolfWalther: Haskell Sex!
rindolfWalther: http://www.shlomifish.org/humour/fortunes/show.cgi?id=sharp-perlcafe-aleenas-little-perl-boys - see also this on #perlcafe many years ago.
njsgbhuddah: for inno setup, sounds like a good name
Waltherrindolf: wonder if that can be pure, or just an IO action
Walther(if you know what i mean)
tomatosaladSirCmpwn: rcombs is always talking about libass
bhuddahnjsg: and you get exactly what you asked for.
njsgHaskell Sex is great, but you don't remember any of it on the next morning, because it has no state
rindolfWalther: with Lady_Aleena who became Mistress_Aleena and Madame_Aleena.
SirCmpwntomatosalad: well, yeah
rindolfnjsg: heh, LOL.
SirCmpwnhe's an irrational wizard
rindolfnjsg: you crack me up.
rindolfnjsg: maybe we need something like Smalltalk sex with a persistent VM.
rindolfSqueak FTW!
njsglisp, as one of the only languages which can truly return multiple values, is the only way to have true multiple orgasms as a result of sex
rindolfHeh, someone I know will get the kick out of this conversation.
Waltherrindolf: :'D
rindolfGeek pseudo sex-talk.
WaltherStateless sex could be a bit difficult to reach though, as it'd require a REST api, and you just might fall asleep
rindolfnjsg: heh.
rindolfWalther: heh.
rindolfWalther++
WaltherOTOH clean, stateful sex should be easy, with SOAP
rindolfWalther: SOAP! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
* Waltherputs stateful sex with a SOAP in Bucket
* Buckethands Walther another serving of rat oh vah in exchange for stateful sex with a SOAP
rindolfWalther: /me runs away in the opposite direction. No amount of sex is worth having to deal with SOAP.
rindolfThere are some things even I won't do for sex.
njsgrindolf: just have sex over TCP, looks like a good protocol
rindolfAnd SOAP is one of them.
njsgcrushes are UDP, love is TCP, sex is SOAP over HTTP
Waltherand then there's the weird kid with the gopher
rindolfWell, I refuse to get paid to write Java enterprise software - http://www.shlomifish.org/humour/bits/Emma-Watson-applying-for-a-software-dev-job/ .
rindolfnjsg: heh.
njsgat least nobody mentioned COBRA yet, others would go all OMG
Channelxkcd
Networkirc.foonetic.net
Published2014-07-03