[ Selina runs into The Master, a big man with a stern look. ]
The Master: Greetings, Ms. Mandrake! I am glad to meet you so I can fulfil my destiny.
Selina: I presume you are…
The Master: The Master. This is right. The vampire with the oldest soul.
Selina: And I’m supposed to slay you?
The Master: That is correct.
Selina: Well, even though I think you demons’ lot are complete freakshows, you seem amusing and interesting, so I have no intention of slaying you as long as you remain harmless to me physically.
The Master: Fair enough. [Starts walking with her.] So, Ms. Mandrake, how have you been doing lately?
Selina: Oh, you know - the usual: school, leisure, fixing computer problems, hanging out with my friends, slaying demons. The works? How about you Mr.…
The Master: Oh, call me Karl.
Selina: Karl, heh. I always thought it would be befitting for the Master to be Karl the Great, you know… Charlemagne.
Selina: “Mhmm”?? Hold it, you are Charlemagne! Wow, that’s so cool.
Selina: Tell me: how did you become a vampire? And surely you cannot be the vampire with the oldest soul! And did you ever come to educate your descendants? After all, you forefathered the better half of the European nobility. I want to hear all about it!
The Master: SILENCE, SELINA! YOU HAVE REVEALED MY TRUE IDENTITY AND NOW I MUST PERISH, FOR NO ONE HAS DONE THAT UNTIL NOW. THE PROPHECIES OF THE CODEX HAVE COME TRUE - I HAVE BEEN SLAIN BY THE SLAYER. AWWWWWWWWWWWW!
[ His soul leaves his body with many effects, many of Selina’s schoolmates watch the show with interest. Eventually the Master’s body drops dead on the floor intact. ]
Selina: Oh, God! I cannot believe it.
[ Selina reaches out to touch the body using her hand, and the body evaporates.
The spectators start clapping and whistling. Selina bursts into tears and leaves the scene. ]